Marriage by Pregnancy

[Forgiven70x700]

Recently I've been told by another Christian that if a girl gets pregnant by her boyfriend they should with out question get married.  That's the right thing to do, I was told.  I questioned, what if one of them is a believer and the other is not - should they still get married, as the Bible tells us to not be unequally yoked?

I know God's plan is for a man and woman to believe in Him, get married, and then have kids.  Should the advice we give others who are not following this plan be cut and dry?  (If you're pregnant marry your boyfriend, and if you are the boyfriend marry your girlfriend - it's what God wants you to do.)  

If two people get married and are not committed to Christ, there is going to be trouble and maybe even divorce.  I'm not sure I want to use the cut and dry approach that where pregnancy is concerned - marriage is the answer. 

Please help shed some light.

Forgiven70x700 - God bless!

[Seeker]

I think you're right, Forgiven.

As you stated, it's God's will that man and woman fall in love, get married, then have children.  It reflects Christ's life giving love for His Bride, the church.

Children need a mother and father, but having children out of wedlock is not a reason to become married, UNLESS you also love each other and would have become married anyway.  For Catholics, the marriage may not be valid if the man and woman are getting married not because they love each other, but out of fear.

I think marriage is the right thing to do if you love that person and wish to be married even if the girl had not gotten pregnant.  Marriage is the wrong thing to do, if you get married ONLY because the girl got pregnant.  However, even in that case, the man has a duty to fulfill his responsibility as a father and help care for his child.

[Melody]

Hey Forgiven,

Interesting question. I hope it's not a problem you're actually facing - how to advise such people, because it can be hard.

My way of dealing with such a situation would be to PRAY. There is lots of power in prayer and it's the way God will tell them what He wants them to do. As you rightly said, our advise to others cannot be cut and dry because our faith is not cut and dry. Though the truth does not change and though the Bible is 100% correct, God deals with each of us as individuals.

The decision to marry should be based on these two peoples feelings for each other, for the baby, their plans to bring the child up etc Only after a lot of prayer and councelling should they go ahead and make a decision.

Just mho

Blessings,

Melody